Looking back to the last time I posted here: I was a mess.
I still am, really.
I'm just a bit more anchored to life than then.
I started group DBT; this morning was my second group. It's a group of all women, and they all seem nice enough. I think I'm still too anxious to think about making a friend there. The group itself is.. confusing. The week that I started, they were doing one of the 'hard' parts of DBT. (Dialectics.) So, it didn't quite take, but I have at least a year of this to get it right. Today.. this week is mindfulness.. it makes a little more sense.
I've still been having my individual sessions with my therapist, and they're going really well.
I'm a rollercoaster in black-and-white. I get down, so down - 'pits of hell' down - and when I start to feel better, I start to feel worse because I shouldn't be allowed to feel good, or I don't deserve it, or I start feeling worse simply because I'd even instantaneously felt some relief.
My going to the Wiccan Church is helping... it's really great. I even made a friend there. Everyone else is wonderful and nice and welcoming. My therapist thinks this - religion - is good for me. Having a higher power to place faith in when I need help.
I don't have too much to tell, it'd just been a while.
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